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One day I will  be a writer.

Although, ask me what sort of writing, and I must confess that I don't have that part of it nailed down, yet.  Not exactly.  It will be exciting stuff, when I finally get around to it... worlds will drip off the tip of my virtual pen... gritty landscapes... paced by dark-yet-funny characters, smart-yet-cool heroes.  And heroines.  There will be fighting.   And sex.   There may be zombies.  Alien races.  Talking animals. Or historic warriors.  There may be a rebel angel.  Or demons.  Or all of the above, duking it out apocalyptically.  I admit, I once thought I might write about vampires - alas there must be a literary moratorium on nosferati, as they are presently covered in bad-movie-poop.  But I digress.

My point is that I'd never -not ever- have guessed that I could find myself writing about anal blisters... yes... disturbingly large, debilitatingly painful, annoyingly persistent butt bubbles... you know... you have experienced them, or heard of them... the ones that must not be named (but their name begins with H, and rhymes with asteroid)...